A Truly Auspicious Day

Today–Monday, the twenty-first of April, Anno Domini 2014–is a very great day.

Why? Two reasons.

First, and of utmost importance, my big-little brother turns sixteen today. Sixteen.

Five-year-old me was dead set on having a baby sister. I can remember quite clearly, in fact, yelling at my oldest brother in disbelief when he told me that Mom had had a boy. How could he insinuate such things? Liar! Of course Mom was going to have a girl!!

Then Grandma and Grandpa took us to the hospital, and I got to hold my baby brother. It was love at first sight. Who wants baby sisters anyhow? (Just kidding–I also love them. In fact, when Lilly was born I think Ruth and I maybe screamed a little in happiness. But that’s a different story.)

Fast forward–isn’t that a strange phrase? Just think, not so long ago its meaning would have been completely unintelligible. Now we use it as if it has always been in our lexical arsenal. At any rate, fast forward sixteen years, and now that adorable baby boy is now a handsome young man. (Does that embarrass you, Ben? You’ll notice I didn’t use the term “cute” because even I know that’s going over the line.) However, more than just being attractive, Ben’s grown into a godly young man who knows how to work, who knows how to take responsibility, who knows how to protect the ones he loves, who knows how to hug. I’ve had my share of bossy-overbearing-big-sister moments, and he’s had one or two of his own moments, but overall, God’s given us a good relationship. Ben, I just wanted the world to know (and by “world,” I mean “my four followers”) to know that I love you, I’m proud of you, and I thank God that you weren’t a girl. Happy sweet sixteen! Want to can more beans this summer?

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P.S. For bonus points, sing “Happy Birthday Sweet Sixteen” to Ben today. Also, I want video evidence.

Of secondary importance, I was interviewed by Anne Elisabeth Stengl today! (I repeat, if you haven’t read her books, do.) Hop over there to join the conversation and enter to win a fabulous Five Glass Slippers mug! You know you want it.

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Please ignore the black eye I have in that photo. My webcam is terrible, but the best way for me to take selfies.

May your Monday be as fantastic as mine is looking to be!

 

A Very Condensed List of Things I Don’t Understand

I have a lot of questions. Bonus points if you can answer them for me.

  1. Why am I addicted to saving dryer sheets? Seriously. I can’t seem to keep myself from re-using them. Mom got me an entire box before I came to college, and I’ve barely dented it. Someone help me. I’m a dryer sheet hoarder.
  2. Why is the white crayon the most used crayon I possess? That makes absolutely zero sense. You could say it’s because I colored a wedding picture for Jenna, but it was while getting my crayons out to color that picture that I noticed this strange fact. Twinsie #2–bless her heart–sent me the crayons in the mail, which means they were new last semester, which means that at some point in the past few months I rabidly used a white crayon. What am I, crazy?
  3. Who designs air freshener to look like yogurt? On a related note, who designs air freshener to smell like cough syrup? On another related note, who put a sign on the bathroom door warning library patrons not to eat the yogurt?
  4. What happened to the legs of Jenna’s pinata?
  5. What’s written on the inside of the box in which we keep the International Bulletin of Missionary Research archives, and who wrote it?
  6. What happened to that stick of butter I had in the freezer?
  7. I want to make brownies. Real ones, not brown letter “E”s this time. Though that was pretty fun. Ok, so this isn’t a question. It’s just how I’m feeling.
  8. Why do those guys sit at that table in the corner all the time? I feel judged whenever I get ketchup refills. Which happens whenever I get ketchup fills. Because I always underestimate my love of ketchup, and that is a fact.
  9. Why am I so mean to Katie? I actually like her a lot.
  10. Why do I do whatever anyone tells me to do?
    Example A, an evening in the library
    Kristen: Betsy, take Matthew’s wallet and put it in that drawer! Quick, while he’s not looking!
    Me: Uh, yes Kristen!
    (Twenty seconds later)
    Me: Wait. Why on earth did I just do that? That’s stupid!
    Kristen: Too late.

    Example B, an evening in the dining hall
    Me: Oooh. Ice cream. I want ice cream. But I’m not eating any.
    Tim: You should eat some.
    Me: No I shouldn’t. That is bad for me.
    Tim: Get some ice cream. (stares judgementaly until I feel terrible for not listening to him command)
    Me: No! Who even asked you to sit at this table?
    Tim: (walks away dejectedly)
    Twenty seconds later
    Tim: Betsy, since you made me feel bad, you have to go get ice cream now.
    Me: Fine!!!! Okay! Whatever!
    Twenty seconds later
    Me: Wait, why am I eating this?
    Tim: Because I told you to.

Please, folks, I need a lot of help.

Housekeeping

No, I don’t mean that I need to clean my room. Well, OK. My desk may be just a teensy-weensy bit messy. Also, I think I need to take out the trash. But Jenna and I have passed BOTH room inspections this week (unlike SOME people who got INFRACTIONS!), so we must be doing pretty well.

No, no. What I mean by “housekeeping” is that I have a few random, desultory, and otherwise catagory-less issues to address…beginning with fan mail.

Yes, you heard me correctly. Fan mail. Now, before you roll your eyes in exasperation at my presumptuousness, let me assure you, dear reader, that I am quite serious. I have fans! My mother, first of all, obviously. And since she’s like one of the coolest people to have ever graced the face of the terrestrial globe, I’m pretty proud of having acquired that fan. And also my bestest friends. But that’s not all. Two–yes, TWO!–students came up to me after my last post and told me they like my blog. And now one’s, like, pressuring me to write again because I’m so witty and I make her laugh and all that stuff. Sigh. Guys. It’s so difficult, dealing with fans! Also, now I may or may not have to watch whom I quote on here… But anyhow. Onto the fan mail.

Joy asks, “HOW do you hurt you FOOT playing SPOONS!?!”

Well, you see, this college is very much unlike my previous college in that the majority of the student body is under 25 instead of over 45. So instead of playing normal spoons with the spoons in the center of a circle and then taking them surreptitiously, we just threw them all around the lounge or had people hide them and then raced to see who could get them first. I did, at a great cost to my chubby little foot.

From the Ruthron: “I…have a very strong urge to do a cover of Constant Angel that’s ABC approved for you.”

DO IT. Please. Por favor. 請. And all the other ways to say please that I don’t know. (Also, the Ruthron sent me some super sweet randomly selected encouraging verses of the day in the mail Tuesday. Or Wednesday. Whatever. They were this and this, if you want to be encouraged, too.)

Second, a poll. My lovely aforementioned Mother, Mother, Best AND Dearest OF Mothers intelligently suggested that my new title be either the “Jubilated Librarian” or the “Bookish Bellringer.” My problem is that I don’t know which is cooler. Ergo, you get to be the deciding voice!

[awkward pause]

Um. Wait. I THOUGHT THERE WAS AN “INSERT POLL” BUTTON! Shoot. I was going to be all fancy and everything, in keeping with my new Very Interesting Campus Blogger personality. Sigh. Y’all can just comment, k?

WAIT WAIT WAIT I FOUND IT! Here.

Third, an update to the scores, since Mother, Mother, Best AND Dearest OF Mothers had such wonderful suggestions:

Twinsie 2

2

2 Sheep

1

Mother, Mother, etc.

2

If you’d like points of your own, simply mail me a picture of a purple sparkly dancing cat.

And last, but not least, your favorite part…“Overheard at ABC!” Student who will not be named: “I don’t want to be a nun. I’m FAR too fond of the idea of being pregnant!”

Yeah.

Pray for us, guys.